Ready or Not 2011, Here I Come!

Ann Taintor’s quotes are spunky, sarcastic, and downright brutally funny. Some of her quotes remind me of myself, while others make me want to be like the situations she quotes. With the New Year comes New Year’s Resolutions for some of us. I’ve long since succumbed to the realization that I will break my resolutions sure as I break a nail after a manicure. So, instead, I’m creating my own version of New Year’s Rules I want to live by…


1.) “I'm becoming my mother.” – My mom is loving, loyal, and can cook so well you’d think she was working to fatten you up for the holidays (so says my ex). I could stand to be a little more like her. She’s strong, no shrinking violet, and will turn into Mamma Bear if anyone messes with her cub or grand-cubs.

2.) “Why, yes I am that kind of girl.” – What kind of girl, you may ask? The kind who knows what she wants, isn’t afraid to work for what she wants, and will move Heaven and Hell to get to the place she needs to be in order to grow and become a better person in this life.

3.) “Old enough to know better... too young to give a rat's ass.” – Being a risk-taker has never been my strong suit. I have learned, however, that it doesn’t really matter what others think. I will be my own person, be true to myself, and the rest will take care of itself.

4.) “The excitement never ends.” – Yeah, so this one’s probably written tongue-in-cheek, and most days I feel this way. BUT, if I truly look around and see the blessings before me each day, I might could possibly turn this one from snarky to realistically positive.

5.) “Stop me before I volunteer again.” – I’ve had my share of volunteer years. With small children, a full-time job, and being a single parent, something’s got to give. I’ll pare down on the volunteering for the time-being and concentrate on my main priority – my kids.

6.) “You be Thelma. I'll be Louise.” – I’ve had long-standing jokes with several girlfriends about one of us being Thelma and the other Louise. I’m thinking maybe 2011 needs to be the year I start “getting my Louise on” – being independent and head-strong (but in a good way, mind you) in order to make good things happen for my kids and me.

7.) “She was disinclined to play by the rules.” – I’d much rather this quote be, “She was disinclined to play by his rules.” I hold onto certain ideals that I won’t compromise for anyone. So, if I don’t play by others’ rules, then I’ll continue to be true to me and my compass will continue to lead me true North.

8.) “We all have our baggage.” – Baggage is accumulated over the years, but it doesn’t have to weigh me down. I can take that baggage, sort through the contents, and file items away as ‘lessons learned.’ That way, I will be better able to move into 2011 with all the chips brushed off my shoulders and a positive attitude that will make the situations I encounter successes.

9.) “Funny... I don't recall asking for your opinion.” – You know what ‘they’ say…opinions are like a*&-holes; everybody’s got one. I can have opinions about people, things, or situations, but I don’t necessarily have to share my opinions. In simple terms – keep my mouth shut!

10.) “Not all bad girls wear black...” – Being a ‘bad’ girl has its perks. You can be the kind of woman you feel you should be, dress the way that makes you feel good, and you don’t worry over every little thing like the ‘good’ girls do. I plan to wear what I want to wear (and not in all black!) and be the strong, self-sufficient, and confident gal I’ve always wanted to be from this point forward.

11.) “She wasn't sure she wanted to live happily ever after.” – Are there fairy tale endings? Do we get swept off our feet by a knight in shining armor? Do we live happily ever after in the house with the white picket fence, the 2.5 kids, and the dog and cat amicably getting along? While I enjoy companionship and would like nothing more than to find that one true soul whom I fit with, I don’t intend to hang my hat on that one person’s existence to make me happy. Only I can make me happy.

12.) “He couldn't become a distant memory soon enough to suit her.” – In order to move forward, remain positive, and learn from past experiences, I’m going to purge the anger, resentment, and hostility I feel toward those that have wronged me in some form or fashion. Out with the feelings of negativity, and in with the flow of positive feelings.

13.) “Lactose is just one of the many things I don’t tolerate.” – I’m not lactose intolerant, but I am intolerant of liars, cheats, and a*&-hats. Don’t be one, and we’ll be fine! I promise not to be one either.

14.) “Think of me as ‘unexpected turbulence’.” – I will not “…sit down, sit down, sit down…”, because I want to rock the boat! I am tired of status quo. I will start speaking out, standing up, and making sure at the end of each day, there are no regrets!

15.) “You mess with the kitty, you feel the claws.” – My children are my number one priority. I have their backs just as my parents have always had mine. I try to tamp down on Mamma Bear, but you know what? It’s OK to be the defender of the weak, innocent, and the ones that cannot speak for themselves. Because the lesson they will learn is to always take care of others. If we spent more time caring and less time tearing down, I bet this world wouldn’t be half as crazy as it seems.

Overall, I want to be caring, loyal, and loving to others. I’m going to need a smile to help that along. As Charles M. Shultz said, “There is nothing more attractive than a nice smile.” So, for 2011, the smile reigns!

Oh, and one last thing…Charles M. Schultz was right when he said, “Happiness is a warm puppy.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come home to our new puppy to find her chewing on some LEGO piece, an action figure, or having made a mess on my carpet. But you know what? All that flurry of activity makes me laugh and smile, because I realize the following: I am blessed to have a job that I just came home from, a house I just walked in to, a puppy to always happily greet me at the door, and ‘things’ that may need replacing because of puppy teeth marks. Some people don’t even have half these items…and for that, I know I am to be thankful for what has been given to me, but need to continue to smile while ‘passing it on’ to those less fortunate.

Happy 2011! Peace, Blessings, Love.

All Of Me...

“The holidays , she believed were no time to exercise restraint.”

Ann Taintor (http://www.annetaintor.com/) happens to be one of my favorite sources to quote.  Her product lines pair vintage designs with sassy, sarcastic, and witty quotes that have some bite to them.  My kind of humor!  I'm sure, were we to meet, we'd hit it off fantastically, as I laugh at almost every design she has created.  But what Ann Taintor has done is create an outlet for my ever boisterous, constantly biting humor to transcend into quotes on my Facebook statuses many days.  I may not necessarily be able to exactly identify with the quote posted per se, but if the quote makes me smile, it has served its purpose.

That's the thing about me.  I'm 100% 'all in' when it comes to friends, family, and relationships.  There's no other way to be, is there?!  Well, apparently, there is - a more reserved, bland way that appeals to some.  I don't understand.  I just don't understand.  Why in the world would anyone want to be bland when we're meant to 'live life out loud'?  Life is short; the list of good, true friends even shorter; and the opportunity to meet that one, real, 'soulmate' to spend the rest of this life with slim to none in the chance department.  So, why would anyone want to live life blandly and with restraint, I ask you.

I've come to realize that I may be too much for some folks to handle.  I am loving, caring, compassionate, loyal, true, trustworthy, honest, and will do whatever I have to do for those I hold dear.  In essence, I do not exercise restraint when caring for those I hold near to my heart.  Is that a bad thing?  I don't think so.  However, it must from past experience, give some the nervous twitch as they just don't know what to do with me once they've gotten me on board.

Here's how I see the world in three simple steps: Love Fully, Live Lively, and Give Greatly. 

Love Fully - I have a wonderful support structure in my family.  I also have been blessed with fabulous children.  What else do I have?  The most fantastic, true, loyal friends a gal can ask for; so much so that we would do anything for one another.  And that's the way it should be, mind you.  If we're not willing to give our all for one another in this world, then we're just not living life as it was intended.

Live Lively - Live life as if it's the best (and maybe last) day you've been blessed with!  Look at your children and 'see' them.  Truly see them with your eyes - not glancing around as they speak to you.  Look them in the eyes!  Listen to them!  And 'be' with them.  The same holds true when with family and close friends.  We are only blessed with a small sampling of those type friends that if we had the opportunity to choose would be our 'flesh and blood' family.  Those are the people that hold you up when you think you can no longer stand on bad days; listen to and love you no matter the warts or idiosyncrasies that make up 'you'; and are only a phone call/email/text/or FB message away when you need someone the most.  100% folks; give them 100%!

Give Greatly - whoever said that money can't buy you happiness was absolutely correct.  Because true happiness lies in thinking of others, giving to them, and giving unconditionally.  It doesn't matter if you have $1 or $1,000,000.  If you give unconditionally to those that mean the most to you, you will be a rich person.  Love is the qualifier in this instance.  Love is that emotion that whether it be family love, friend love, or 'lover' love is the high that makes you happy, makes you live life fully, and makes you want to give back just as greatly to others.

So, if you are a part of the 'menagerie' (thank you, new found Sis for this term) that is 'Amy's family-with-or-without-blood-relation', count yourself as one who will receive 100% from me regardless of the time of day, the time of year, or the factors of life that are being thrown our way.  You will always have me - ALL OF ME - and for that, I am grateful, because in doing things for you, in being there for you, or in you allowing me to do for you; you make my life burst at the seams with happiness, contentment, and peace.

Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and let's welcome the New Year as another chance to begin again and make things fantastic, wonderful, and immensely happy for others!

Now Where Did I Put 'It'?

“There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."  ~Erma Bombeck

Holidays are the epitome of anticipation, excitement, frustration, exhaustion, and hope bundled up into one big emotion that if thought about too much, would make a soul want to crawl under the covers and hide until the New Year arrived.  Add to that wish lists from your children that cause you to upend the Pepto Bismol in your search for the items on the coveted list, expectations from 'the world' that you do everything with a flourish (i.e., decorate your home to resemble something out of Southern Living, bake delicious concoctions for work and friends, and host fantastic get-togethers), and the mind, body, and spirit becomes drained.

What is 'it' that seems to be missing?  'It' is the 'Spirit of the Season' of course.  You seem to remember having it last year, last month, or even last week.  But 'it' seems to be missing now.  Where did you put 'it'?  As a mom with two full-time jobs (one paying dividends throughout your life as you raise your children; the other paying bi-monthly as you survive the costs of living day-to-day), responsibilities to keep everyone on schedule, and still ensure the little details (remember that Elf on a Shelf?  Where the heck did you put it last year 'so you'd remember where to find it when Christmas time came around this year'?) become realities, 'it' can seem to be hiding from you at every turn.

How do you find 'it'?  Look around you.  Look at your children's faces every time they 'find the Elf'' in a new location because he's been to the North Pole and back.  Look at the Christmas tree lights at night as you sip hot cocoa after everyone has gone to bed.  Look up and around you at church on Sunday mornings at the Crismon tree, the Nativity scene displays, and the beautifully handmade Advent banners.  But most importantly, look within yourself.  Look inside to find those memories of holidays past where you're helping your grandmother butter the homemade rolls, stir the corn, and fill the glasses full of homemade sweet tea for Christmas dinner.  The memories of waking on Christmas morning to find lovely trinkets in your stocking from Santa that you didn't know you wanted, but once you had them knew they were perfect gifts.  The memories of participating in the holiday church services - attend those services, remember, and dig deep to find 'it'.

Do these things so that when you awake Christmas morning, you feel the anticipation with your children of finding out what Santa brought down that chimney.  Remember the family and friends you love so dearly and are most fortunate enough to spend your days with; and most importantly, remember what it feels like to have the wonder of a child at all the bright lights, the beautifully wrapped gifts, and the reason for this season - Christ was born to us this day.  The 'Spirit of the Season' will come back to you ten-fold.

Peace.  Love.  Merry Christmas.

Livin' Life Southern Belle Style, Y'all

The epitome of a true Southern Belle, to me, has always been the characters Suzanne and Julia Sugarbaker from the television comedy, “Designing Women”. Suzanne, the frilly, flighty, beauty queen seems quite shallow at times, but really does have a tender heart underneath all that make-up.  Her sister, Julia, is the strong, loyal, quick-witted one who can cut a person in two by simply using words. Marry the two personalities together and you have ‘The Southern Belle’ complete with a strand of pearls, high heeled shoes, and the ever present Southern drawl that keeps you hanging on until the very last word is spoken.

Suffice it to say, by living in the south, we are raised with a set of standards that are matched by none.  Southern Belle standards; southern rules of conduct, if you will. There's a great website that sells Southern Belle t-shirts complete with sassy sayings: http://www.southernbellestore.com/.  If you want a quick laugh or have a Southern Belle that you think lives one of the quotes from the t-shirts, check the site out and order something!

Sassy sayings and quotes stick with us.  We will remember those type words long after others' advice has been forgotten.  Here are a few that stuck with me - they seem to be a modern day Southern Belle's words to live by, if such a list were ever to exist.

1.) “Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.” – Didn’t your Mamma ever teach you that ‘can’t never could’? Keep your eyes on the ball, remain focused, and think positive! Life is not to be lived on the sidelines.

2.) “Southern Belle weight loss tip…use super glue as lip gloss!” – That old Jimmy Buffett song, Fruitcakes, has a line in it: “…I treat my body like a temple, you treat yours like a tent…” For goodness sakes, honey-chile, you are what you eat! Don’t be a twinkie or a ho-ho. Little Debbie sure is cute, but I bet she’s not stuffing her face full of Swiss Cake Rolls right now either!

3.) “Life is a grindstone…whether it grinds you down or polishes you up depends on what you are made of!” – True pearls, when tested, have a bit of grit to them. Regardless of what life throws your way, if you survive it with a positive attitude, you may have a few rough spots about you but you'll become the ‘real deal’. Those smooth folks are the fakers!

4.) “Focus on your own drama…I can handle mine!” – Mind your own business, darlin’. We Southerners live in towns where everybody knows our name. We don’t need you gettin’ up in our business, too, and spreadin’ word all over town! Just remember, one of these days you’ll have some business you don’t want spread…

5.) “Sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together.” – Honey, we all think change is bad. But what happens when the good Lord causes upheaval in our lives? He’s providin’ the window we need for that item to fly.  That way, there's more room for 'the better things in life' to walk right on in through the front door! 

6.) “Sugah, a Southern Belle knows if our southern drawl doesn’t get you, our southern charm will!” – Now, you know you’ll do just about anything for a sweet, Southern Belle to respond, “Why darlin’, aren’t you the bee’s knees?!”

7.) “Southern Belles don’t get grey hair, we call them stress highlights!” – Turn that frown upside down! And nevah, evah let them see you ‘glisten’. Grey is the new blonde, don’t you know?

8.) “Life is short; keep your party dress on.” – Living life out loud is the best part of the deal. Don’t forget we’re only given one chance to live; make the most of it!

9.) “A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, strong enough to fix them, and smart enough to listen to me next time!" – My sweet Papaw used to say about my Mamaw that while he was the head of the household, she was the neck that turned it. Take note, gentlemen, we Southern Belles were created to be strong, resilient, and yet soft as cashmere. You may try, but you will never tame us!

10.) “Don’t ever look down on anyone unless you are helping them up.” – Sounds like a good bit of ‘hometrainin’’ to me (thank you very much, dear college roomie for that term)…make sure you always help others out. You never know when you’re going to find yourself down on your luck and in need of a friend.

11.) “No matter how far you travel the world, you’ll find nothing better than an Alabama girl.” – Just think about this: we’re Southern Belles, we love our Daddy’s, and we root for good ole places like Auburn University…can’t ask for much more in a worthy gal, now can you?

12.) "The most precious gems you'll ever put around your neck are the arms of your children!" - My Pride and Joy can chase the blues away any day with a hug.  I love those children 'to the moon and back' and always welcome one of their 'big mama bear hugs'!

13.) "In life everyone trips...some fail, but some turn the trip into a Beautiful Dance!" - Well, ain't you something when you can make lemonade out of lemons?!  Try it sometime; it sure beats being an ole sour puss!

14.) "Always use tasteful words because you may have to eat them!" - Eatin' crow is not a delicacy!

15.) “Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go what you can’t change.” – Laughter truly is the best medicine. Apologies should be sincere. Letting go of the things you cannot change makes room for more laughter and fun. Refer to Rule #8 on this one, darlin’! If you can laugh and let it all go, you’ve got more time to dance in that party dress!