Sweet Rememberance...

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles." 

~Audrey Hepburn

Pink...the favorite color of my Aunt El, who passed away Monday, January 24, 2011.  Who knew?  I didn't.  But now that my Mom talks about it, she says one of her older sisters remembers my Aunt El at one time having pink appliances in her kitchen as a newlywed.  Can't say as I've ever thought of pink in quite that tone of decorating style, but who am I to judge?  My kitchen walls are pink and my kitchen valances are pink/green plaid.  Maybe there is a little of my Aunt El in me...hopefully so...

You see, my Aunt was a wonderful lady.  Eldest of seven kids to my grandparents.  Seven.  Count em' - six sisters (a set of twins in the mix) and one brother.  Wow.  Seven kids.  And I wonder now why my parents stopped with just me...ha!

My Aunt was many things to many people.  She was first and foremost the lady I sent pictures to of my children for all occasions.  Albeit, the pictures had to be sent to my grandmother's home for my Aunt to receive them, but she enjoyed keeping up with my children.  My Aunt always asked about my kids.  She was always interested.

My Aunt was an events director at a local nursing home in her town.  She was quite the person to know, as the residents all loved her.  And, I think she loved each of them, too.  She derived pleasure out of her job (from what my Mom said), and she was doing something for others, which is the type of person we all should strive to be throughout our lives.

My Aunt made the best coconut cakes known to man.  Those cakes were wonderful additions to the holiday gatherings at my grandparents' home.  I remember going out to my grandparents' back porch (where the casket freezer stored everything extra that wouldn't fit in the kitchen freezer), surveying the goodies all the family members had prepared, and being drawn to those coconut cakes.  I have no idea why as I'm not a huge fan of coconut.  But, let me tell you, my Aunt's cakes would turn you onto coconut in a heartbeat!

Lastly, my Aunt was a survivor.  She survived an abusive spouse.  She survived breast cancer.  She survived many years with Parkinson's.  However, the look on my Mom's face the last trip to visit told me that my Aunt was not surviving Parkinson's and dementia in the nursing home facility where she lived out the remainder of her days.  Funny how she could battle and win against an asshole that beat her and "the big C", but a couple of other diseases pile on and at age 79, she passes on to heaven.  But, you know, after the life she endured here on earth, she was welcomed into heaven with open arms. 

So, I will not remember my Aunt sadly.  Nor, will I give her 'louse of a spouse' the satisfaction of remembering her based upon his atrocities.  I will remember my Aunt based on the words of Audrey Hepburn:

Aunt El loved the color pink.  Aunt El had a funny laugh (almost a cackle, but when she smiled, you could tell whose sister she was - she and my Mom look alike somewhat).  Aunt El was strong; even when everything seemed to be going wrong in her life.  Aunt El was a 'pretty girl' because she had that smile, that laugh, and that kindness about her that made the folks she worked with at the nursing home love her.

And me?  Well, I believe that tomorrow IS another day.  And I believe in miracles.  The miracle of a strong, resilient, loving woman making it through life against odds to be welcomed as the newest angel in heaven.

I Love You, Aunt El.  May you be remembered for the wonderful aunt, sister, and human being you were; and may the negatives of your life be small blips 'between the dashes'.

Ready or Not 2011, Here I Come!

Ann Taintor’s quotes are spunky, sarcastic, and downright brutally funny. Some of her quotes remind me of myself, while others make me want to be like the situations she quotes. With the New Year comes New Year’s Resolutions for some of us. I’ve long since succumbed to the realization that I will break my resolutions sure as I break a nail after a manicure. So, instead, I’m creating my own version of New Year’s Rules I want to live by…


1.) “I'm becoming my mother.” – My mom is loving, loyal, and can cook so well you’d think she was working to fatten you up for the holidays (so says my ex). I could stand to be a little more like her. She’s strong, no shrinking violet, and will turn into Mamma Bear if anyone messes with her cub or grand-cubs.

2.) “Why, yes I am that kind of girl.” – What kind of girl, you may ask? The kind who knows what she wants, isn’t afraid to work for what she wants, and will move Heaven and Hell to get to the place she needs to be in order to grow and become a better person in this life.

3.) “Old enough to know better... too young to give a rat's ass.” – Being a risk-taker has never been my strong suit. I have learned, however, that it doesn’t really matter what others think. I will be my own person, be true to myself, and the rest will take care of itself.

4.) “The excitement never ends.” – Yeah, so this one’s probably written tongue-in-cheek, and most days I feel this way. BUT, if I truly look around and see the blessings before me each day, I might could possibly turn this one from snarky to realistically positive.

5.) “Stop me before I volunteer again.” – I’ve had my share of volunteer years. With small children, a full-time job, and being a single parent, something’s got to give. I’ll pare down on the volunteering for the time-being and concentrate on my main priority – my kids.

6.) “You be Thelma. I'll be Louise.” – I’ve had long-standing jokes with several girlfriends about one of us being Thelma and the other Louise. I’m thinking maybe 2011 needs to be the year I start “getting my Louise on” – being independent and head-strong (but in a good way, mind you) in order to make good things happen for my kids and me.

7.) “She was disinclined to play by the rules.” – I’d much rather this quote be, “She was disinclined to play by his rules.” I hold onto certain ideals that I won’t compromise for anyone. So, if I don’t play by others’ rules, then I’ll continue to be true to me and my compass will continue to lead me true North.

8.) “We all have our baggage.” – Baggage is accumulated over the years, but it doesn’t have to weigh me down. I can take that baggage, sort through the contents, and file items away as ‘lessons learned.’ That way, I will be better able to move into 2011 with all the chips brushed off my shoulders and a positive attitude that will make the situations I encounter successes.

9.) “Funny... I don't recall asking for your opinion.” – You know what ‘they’ say…opinions are like a*&-holes; everybody’s got one. I can have opinions about people, things, or situations, but I don’t necessarily have to share my opinions. In simple terms – keep my mouth shut!

10.) “Not all bad girls wear black...” – Being a ‘bad’ girl has its perks. You can be the kind of woman you feel you should be, dress the way that makes you feel good, and you don’t worry over every little thing like the ‘good’ girls do. I plan to wear what I want to wear (and not in all black!) and be the strong, self-sufficient, and confident gal I’ve always wanted to be from this point forward.

11.) “She wasn't sure she wanted to live happily ever after.” – Are there fairy tale endings? Do we get swept off our feet by a knight in shining armor? Do we live happily ever after in the house with the white picket fence, the 2.5 kids, and the dog and cat amicably getting along? While I enjoy companionship and would like nothing more than to find that one true soul whom I fit with, I don’t intend to hang my hat on that one person’s existence to make me happy. Only I can make me happy.

12.) “He couldn't become a distant memory soon enough to suit her.” – In order to move forward, remain positive, and learn from past experiences, I’m going to purge the anger, resentment, and hostility I feel toward those that have wronged me in some form or fashion. Out with the feelings of negativity, and in with the flow of positive feelings.

13.) “Lactose is just one of the many things I don’t tolerate.” – I’m not lactose intolerant, but I am intolerant of liars, cheats, and a*&-hats. Don’t be one, and we’ll be fine! I promise not to be one either.

14.) “Think of me as ‘unexpected turbulence’.” – I will not “…sit down, sit down, sit down…”, because I want to rock the boat! I am tired of status quo. I will start speaking out, standing up, and making sure at the end of each day, there are no regrets!

15.) “You mess with the kitty, you feel the claws.” – My children are my number one priority. I have their backs just as my parents have always had mine. I try to tamp down on Mamma Bear, but you know what? It’s OK to be the defender of the weak, innocent, and the ones that cannot speak for themselves. Because the lesson they will learn is to always take care of others. If we spent more time caring and less time tearing down, I bet this world wouldn’t be half as crazy as it seems.

Overall, I want to be caring, loyal, and loving to others. I’m going to need a smile to help that along. As Charles M. Shultz said, “There is nothing more attractive than a nice smile.” So, for 2011, the smile reigns!

Oh, and one last thing…Charles M. Schultz was right when he said, “Happiness is a warm puppy.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come home to our new puppy to find her chewing on some LEGO piece, an action figure, or having made a mess on my carpet. But you know what? All that flurry of activity makes me laugh and smile, because I realize the following: I am blessed to have a job that I just came home from, a house I just walked in to, a puppy to always happily greet me at the door, and ‘things’ that may need replacing because of puppy teeth marks. Some people don’t even have half these items…and for that, I know I am to be thankful for what has been given to me, but need to continue to smile while ‘passing it on’ to those less fortunate.

Happy 2011! Peace, Blessings, Love.

All Of Me...

“The holidays , she believed were no time to exercise restraint.”

Ann Taintor (http://www.annetaintor.com/) happens to be one of my favorite sources to quote.  Her product lines pair vintage designs with sassy, sarcastic, and witty quotes that have some bite to them.  My kind of humor!  I'm sure, were we to meet, we'd hit it off fantastically, as I laugh at almost every design she has created.  But what Ann Taintor has done is create an outlet for my ever boisterous, constantly biting humor to transcend into quotes on my Facebook statuses many days.  I may not necessarily be able to exactly identify with the quote posted per se, but if the quote makes me smile, it has served its purpose.

That's the thing about me.  I'm 100% 'all in' when it comes to friends, family, and relationships.  There's no other way to be, is there?!  Well, apparently, there is - a more reserved, bland way that appeals to some.  I don't understand.  I just don't understand.  Why in the world would anyone want to be bland when we're meant to 'live life out loud'?  Life is short; the list of good, true friends even shorter; and the opportunity to meet that one, real, 'soulmate' to spend the rest of this life with slim to none in the chance department.  So, why would anyone want to live life blandly and with restraint, I ask you.

I've come to realize that I may be too much for some folks to handle.  I am loving, caring, compassionate, loyal, true, trustworthy, honest, and will do whatever I have to do for those I hold dear.  In essence, I do not exercise restraint when caring for those I hold near to my heart.  Is that a bad thing?  I don't think so.  However, it must from past experience, give some the nervous twitch as they just don't know what to do with me once they've gotten me on board.

Here's how I see the world in three simple steps: Love Fully, Live Lively, and Give Greatly. 

Love Fully - I have a wonderful support structure in my family.  I also have been blessed with fabulous children.  What else do I have?  The most fantastic, true, loyal friends a gal can ask for; so much so that we would do anything for one another.  And that's the way it should be, mind you.  If we're not willing to give our all for one another in this world, then we're just not living life as it was intended.

Live Lively - Live life as if it's the best (and maybe last) day you've been blessed with!  Look at your children and 'see' them.  Truly see them with your eyes - not glancing around as they speak to you.  Look them in the eyes!  Listen to them!  And 'be' with them.  The same holds true when with family and close friends.  We are only blessed with a small sampling of those type friends that if we had the opportunity to choose would be our 'flesh and blood' family.  Those are the people that hold you up when you think you can no longer stand on bad days; listen to and love you no matter the warts or idiosyncrasies that make up 'you'; and are only a phone call/email/text/or FB message away when you need someone the most.  100% folks; give them 100%!

Give Greatly - whoever said that money can't buy you happiness was absolutely correct.  Because true happiness lies in thinking of others, giving to them, and giving unconditionally.  It doesn't matter if you have $1 or $1,000,000.  If you give unconditionally to those that mean the most to you, you will be a rich person.  Love is the qualifier in this instance.  Love is that emotion that whether it be family love, friend love, or 'lover' love is the high that makes you happy, makes you live life fully, and makes you want to give back just as greatly to others.

So, if you are a part of the 'menagerie' (thank you, new found Sis for this term) that is 'Amy's family-with-or-without-blood-relation', count yourself as one who will receive 100% from me regardless of the time of day, the time of year, or the factors of life that are being thrown our way.  You will always have me - ALL OF ME - and for that, I am grateful, because in doing things for you, in being there for you, or in you allowing me to do for you; you make my life burst at the seams with happiness, contentment, and peace.

Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and let's welcome the New Year as another chance to begin again and make things fantastic, wonderful, and immensely happy for others!

Now Where Did I Put 'It'?

“There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."  ~Erma Bombeck

Holidays are the epitome of anticipation, excitement, frustration, exhaustion, and hope bundled up into one big emotion that if thought about too much, would make a soul want to crawl under the covers and hide until the New Year arrived.  Add to that wish lists from your children that cause you to upend the Pepto Bismol in your search for the items on the coveted list, expectations from 'the world' that you do everything with a flourish (i.e., decorate your home to resemble something out of Southern Living, bake delicious concoctions for work and friends, and host fantastic get-togethers), and the mind, body, and spirit becomes drained.

What is 'it' that seems to be missing?  'It' is the 'Spirit of the Season' of course.  You seem to remember having it last year, last month, or even last week.  But 'it' seems to be missing now.  Where did you put 'it'?  As a mom with two full-time jobs (one paying dividends throughout your life as you raise your children; the other paying bi-monthly as you survive the costs of living day-to-day), responsibilities to keep everyone on schedule, and still ensure the little details (remember that Elf on a Shelf?  Where the heck did you put it last year 'so you'd remember where to find it when Christmas time came around this year'?) become realities, 'it' can seem to be hiding from you at every turn.

How do you find 'it'?  Look around you.  Look at your children's faces every time they 'find the Elf'' in a new location because he's been to the North Pole and back.  Look at the Christmas tree lights at night as you sip hot cocoa after everyone has gone to bed.  Look up and around you at church on Sunday mornings at the Crismon tree, the Nativity scene displays, and the beautifully handmade Advent banners.  But most importantly, look within yourself.  Look inside to find those memories of holidays past where you're helping your grandmother butter the homemade rolls, stir the corn, and fill the glasses full of homemade sweet tea for Christmas dinner.  The memories of waking on Christmas morning to find lovely trinkets in your stocking from Santa that you didn't know you wanted, but once you had them knew they were perfect gifts.  The memories of participating in the holiday church services - attend those services, remember, and dig deep to find 'it'.

Do these things so that when you awake Christmas morning, you feel the anticipation with your children of finding out what Santa brought down that chimney.  Remember the family and friends you love so dearly and are most fortunate enough to spend your days with; and most importantly, remember what it feels like to have the wonder of a child at all the bright lights, the beautifully wrapped gifts, and the reason for this season - Christ was born to us this day.  The 'Spirit of the Season' will come back to you ten-fold.

Peace.  Love.  Merry Christmas.

Livin' Life Southern Belle Style, Y'all

The epitome of a true Southern Belle, to me, has always been the characters Suzanne and Julia Sugarbaker from the television comedy, “Designing Women”. Suzanne, the frilly, flighty, beauty queen seems quite shallow at times, but really does have a tender heart underneath all that make-up.  Her sister, Julia, is the strong, loyal, quick-witted one who can cut a person in two by simply using words. Marry the two personalities together and you have ‘The Southern Belle’ complete with a strand of pearls, high heeled shoes, and the ever present Southern drawl that keeps you hanging on until the very last word is spoken.

Suffice it to say, by living in the south, we are raised with a set of standards that are matched by none.  Southern Belle standards; southern rules of conduct, if you will. There's a great website that sells Southern Belle t-shirts complete with sassy sayings: http://www.southernbellestore.com/.  If you want a quick laugh or have a Southern Belle that you think lives one of the quotes from the t-shirts, check the site out and order something!

Sassy sayings and quotes stick with us.  We will remember those type words long after others' advice has been forgotten.  Here are a few that stuck with me - they seem to be a modern day Southern Belle's words to live by, if such a list were ever to exist.

1.) “Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.” – Didn’t your Mamma ever teach you that ‘can’t never could’? Keep your eyes on the ball, remain focused, and think positive! Life is not to be lived on the sidelines.

2.) “Southern Belle weight loss tip…use super glue as lip gloss!” – That old Jimmy Buffett song, Fruitcakes, has a line in it: “…I treat my body like a temple, you treat yours like a tent…” For goodness sakes, honey-chile, you are what you eat! Don’t be a twinkie or a ho-ho. Little Debbie sure is cute, but I bet she’s not stuffing her face full of Swiss Cake Rolls right now either!

3.) “Life is a grindstone…whether it grinds you down or polishes you up depends on what you are made of!” – True pearls, when tested, have a bit of grit to them. Regardless of what life throws your way, if you survive it with a positive attitude, you may have a few rough spots about you but you'll become the ‘real deal’. Those smooth folks are the fakers!

4.) “Focus on your own drama…I can handle mine!” – Mind your own business, darlin’. We Southerners live in towns where everybody knows our name. We don’t need you gettin’ up in our business, too, and spreadin’ word all over town! Just remember, one of these days you’ll have some business you don’t want spread…

5.) “Sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together.” – Honey, we all think change is bad. But what happens when the good Lord causes upheaval in our lives? He’s providin’ the window we need for that item to fly.  That way, there's more room for 'the better things in life' to walk right on in through the front door! 

6.) “Sugah, a Southern Belle knows if our southern drawl doesn’t get you, our southern charm will!” – Now, you know you’ll do just about anything for a sweet, Southern Belle to respond, “Why darlin’, aren’t you the bee’s knees?!”

7.) “Southern Belles don’t get grey hair, we call them stress highlights!” – Turn that frown upside down! And nevah, evah let them see you ‘glisten’. Grey is the new blonde, don’t you know?

8.) “Life is short; keep your party dress on.” – Living life out loud is the best part of the deal. Don’t forget we’re only given one chance to live; make the most of it!

9.) “A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, strong enough to fix them, and smart enough to listen to me next time!" – My sweet Papaw used to say about my Mamaw that while he was the head of the household, she was the neck that turned it. Take note, gentlemen, we Southern Belles were created to be strong, resilient, and yet soft as cashmere. You may try, but you will never tame us!

10.) “Don’t ever look down on anyone unless you are helping them up.” – Sounds like a good bit of ‘hometrainin’’ to me (thank you very much, dear college roomie for that term)…make sure you always help others out. You never know when you’re going to find yourself down on your luck and in need of a friend.

11.) “No matter how far you travel the world, you’ll find nothing better than an Alabama girl.” – Just think about this: we’re Southern Belles, we love our Daddy’s, and we root for good ole places like Auburn University…can’t ask for much more in a worthy gal, now can you?

12.) "The most precious gems you'll ever put around your neck are the arms of your children!" - My Pride and Joy can chase the blues away any day with a hug.  I love those children 'to the moon and back' and always welcome one of their 'big mama bear hugs'!

13.) "In life everyone trips...some fail, but some turn the trip into a Beautiful Dance!" - Well, ain't you something when you can make lemonade out of lemons?!  Try it sometime; it sure beats being an ole sour puss!

14.) "Always use tasteful words because you may have to eat them!" - Eatin' crow is not a delicacy!

15.) “Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go what you can’t change.” – Laughter truly is the best medicine. Apologies should be sincere. Letting go of the things you cannot change makes room for more laughter and fun. Refer to Rule #8 on this one, darlin’! If you can laugh and let it all go, you’ve got more time to dance in that party dress!

30 Things...

Below are 30 random things about me that you may/may not already know.  I was tagged for this via Facebook, but thought it was interesting to see what others wrote as their '30 things'...we are all friends for whatever reason, yet we are all individually our own person.  Love how we find that 'thing' to bond with someone over and maybe form a friendship that stands the test of time...

1. I want to volunteer for a living (granted, to be paid to do so would no longer be considered 'volunteering', but there's nothing like the feeling you get when you volunteer).

2. I rarely, if ever, babysat growing up. I was in no way interested in having children either until about age 28. Then came my two kids, and now I wonder what I ever did without them!

3. I want 'that dream date' one of these days. You know the one, where you're dressed in your fancy gown and this 'knight in shining armor' dressed in his tux enjoy a night on the town of dinner, dancing, and listening to 'that hot jazz group' in some swanky setting...yeah, I know I'm not 12 anymore, but hey, a gal's gotta dream, right?!

4. I miss the 'rose colored glasses' view I had as a 20-something. I never wanted to experience liking my dog more than people!

5. My ultimate goal in life was to work with my father and us be 'the team to be reckonded with' - over the span of my career thus far, I've have the opportunity to work with him 3 times. All three times have been absolutely fantastic!

6. I worry about my kids all the time. And I mean the 'Mama Bear' type of worry. Will they grow up into strong, healthy, well-adjusted young men...will they be complete and total gentlemen just like their grandfather...will they learn that 'things' don't count; but people do count...

7. I used to be the most organized, most anal-retentive, most structured person I knew. Now, after kids, divorce, and life in general throwing punches at me left and right? Well, now, I am the most scattered, disorganized, forgetful, but well-meaning woman on the planet. Love me anyway, promise??

8. I found out that when stress leaves your life, so does your 'baby fat' (of course, my 'baby' is in elementary school now, so it's 'lazy fat' instead). Thank goodness that happened, because when my Doctor told me I was on the verge of stroking out because stress was making my BP rise so high, I realized I didn't want to leave my kids in the lurch. They need me and by damn, I'm going to be there for them!

9. I thank God every day for my parents, my children, the experiences I've had the past 20 years, and hope I am prepared for whatever lies ahead. Carrying all these crosses can be pretty tough some days...surely, it's been for a good reason (yes, I'll stop calling you 'Shirley')?

10. I love to sit on my back deck, sweet tea or Diet DP in hand, and listen (truly listen) to the sounds of nature all around me. In the wee hours of the morning when I can look out over the mountain and see the city lights, there's nothing more peaceful.

11. I have been known to be taken seriously on more occasions than I can count, when in fact, I was being dead funny. How can people not understand my sense of humor?! ;)

12. A hug from my children chases all the blues away...ANY DAY!

13. I wish I were more domestic like my Mom - she sews like a champ, irons better than Martha, and cooks without using recipes with whatever is in her kitchen pantry. I have trouble separating my colors from my whites on laundry day!

14. I instantly know when I need to call a friend. I suddenly think of them, they won't leave my mind, and if I don't call and check in with them, something bad happens.

15. I secretly want to be a red-head like my youngest child. I think somehow having red hair will make me a more daring, more spontaneous woman...will my red shoes substitute??

16. I am a shoe whore. I am a snobby shoe whore. I lust after sexy, high-heeled shoes and boots in daring colors and prints, but am too conservative most times to make the purchase.

17. I believe God has laid out a fantastic plan for my life. I, however, am such a Type A controlling personality, that I wish He'd share the blueprints with me every now and then...

18. I think my parents are the best parents on the face of the Earth! I wish everyone could have parents like mine; not my parents, but 'like' my parents!

19. I will fight you for my mom's breaded okra and corn 'off the cob'.

20. I love all types of music. With the exception of most 80s music.  I am able to turn the dial on the radio and stop at nearly every station and sing to whatever song is currently playing (within the first few notes of the song, in fact).

21. I want to be pulled up on stage at a DMB, John Mayer, or Jason Mraz concert and be sung to...and I want to dance around 'like I just don't care' (feeling the urge to put on those red heels...).

22. I sometimes wish I could go back to being a lifeguard/swim coach in the summers again...and have the boys with the '68 Mustangs as dates again...loved those cars...

23. I have completely lost my ability to suffer fools, a*&holes, and jerks well. I silently scream in my head, "This is 'x-hours' I'll never get back from my life!" when I have to listen to their mindless banter.

24. I hate it when people falsely accuse just to make themselves look better. Ain't nothin' worse than a liar. Ain't nothin' worse than a liar that is so desperate for attention that they have to drag your name unfairly and untruthfully through the mud (Reference #23).

25. I want my kids to have a healthy fear of me; but still want 'home' to be the only place they crave to be with their friends as they get older.

26. I don't care what the 'Jones'' have, nor do I care if my 'things' measure up to anyone else's. I do, however, love to hear someone croon, "Me and Mrs. Jones"... :)

27. I've always wanted to have a male 'travel companion'. Something about experiencing new places with a fine specimen of a man is right down my alley (any takers??). LOL!

28. I imagine myself 'the crazy, fun one' at parties, concerts, etc. I am so reserved however, that I'm the only one who sees me dancing, singing, and being a nut in the privacy of my own home (Reference #15 - will red hair help that? Or red high-heeled shoes??).

29. My friends are my greatest assets. I will fight for them, stand up for them, praise them, and allow them to cry (and snot) on my shoulder at any given moment. I will also freely tell them "I Love YOU!" because I think if you feel it, you ought to share it. Too many people go through life not telling each other what they mean as a positive influence in their lives.

30. I want to 'live life out loud' and not waste a single minute! I also want to teach that philosophy to my kids (or at least let them know my Dad's catch-phrase: "Aim, don't let the bas*&rds get you down!").

Words to the Wise...

As a pediatric chaplain, I learn so much from the children. One boy, living with a chronic illness, and I were playing a board game. I kept drawing cards that put me back spaces. He said to me, "That's the way it is in life. Sometimes you get dealt cards you don't like, but you have to just keep on playing."

--Louise Shepard, Syracuse, New York

It's amazing how smart 'little people' can be; so smart, in fact, that we adults often wonder how we became so dumb compared!  A friend and I were having lunch the other day and were discussing our children's wise outlooks on life.  We were amazed at how insightful these kids were, and questioned each other as to if we were ever that bright.  We also wondered why becoming an adult squelched that wise outlook on life, and when exactly did we lose it?
 
I'm amazed each day at the phrases and thoughts that are expressed by my children.  They are so young, yet so wise and deeply rooted in their positive beliefs.  Just two days ago, my oldest was sitting with me to make out his Christmas list.  As we poured over the toy store catalogs, we listed the items he was interested in, and then I asked him which three he wanted Santa to bring.  He mentioned one item and then said, "My second thing I want from Santa is for everyone in the family to have a good Christmas morning."  As we finished up making his list, I asked him for the third item he wanted Santa to bring.  He told me he had all three items on the list.  I said, "But there are only two games; you can ask for a third."  He said, "I already have my third item.  I want everyone to have a good Christmas morning!" 
 
My youngest child is a mini-philosopher.  He's my 'under-the-radar' child.  We think he's not listening, but 9 times out of 10, he has zeroed in on a conversation and hears every last word.  This is also my deeply spiritual child.  He is the one that wants to know if we're going to see our family pets that just passed when we go to Heaven.  He is also the one that constantly asks the tough questions.  He's concerned about things like what happens to our bodies when we die.  He wants to go see the graves of our pets that passed, not understanding quite yet that the grave isn't the most important part of the process.  When I try to explain that the dogs' spirits and souls are in Heaven, he often says, "So we can always keep them in our hearts, and we'll never forget?!"  Exactly, dear child, exactly...
 
It is these little sparks of insight during our days that truly symbolizes the impacts we make on others.  On the days when my kids are fighting like cats and dogs, I can think back to these instances and remember that 1.) they are just kids - kids will be kids (and they may fight, but will hopefully love each other dearly one day); and 2.) I could learn a lot from listening more intently to my children's wise words of wisdom. 
 
I want to find that childish outlook again.  Because when I do, I will know that like the little boy at the pediatric hospital, I may not always like the cards I'm dealt in life, but I can most certainly keep on playing.